When I told various friends and colleagues that I'd be going on a 'date' with Neha Dhupia, I got the responses you'd expect - jealousy, mild rage and a plea to give her phone number. The sun has gone down. It's almost seven in the evening and I'm running from one end to the other and back, from Andheri to Khar and back to Andheri.

With no time to wash my face and style my hair, I rush to Neha's Bandra residence where she is waiting for my arrival, expecting some fresh red roses. In addition to all her obvious qualities - great beauty, extraordinary talent and smart brains - the girl knows how to eat, as I enter her living room and see her having a quick bite. I was late on my date and that's not good. To make matters worse for me, she says, "To come on a date with no roses is so bad. You could've got me at least one. That's minus ten for you straight away." But then that's Neha - a beguiling, maddening bundle of cool, and launches right into the discussions. She orders a black coffee for me. It arrives soon. I lift my mug and just as I was about to sip, I hear, "It's too hot, and if you drop it on my white sofa set, you'll have to wash it yourself." Now that's what inspired me to change my thought on how the 'date' would go about from this point on. I start to take Neha seriously and want to know more about her. I was falling in love - in love with her persona, her attitude and her nostalgia on the opposite sex. What's more? My fixation for Megan Fox had just come to an end. I mean, uploading pictures of Neha Dhupia on my monitor would often cause my computer to melt down, wouldn't it? With a gait that is vaguely feline and an expression that is not particularly apologetic, Miss Dhupia flicks back a whip-straight strand of black hair and says, "You've never met me before and you have no idea what you're getting into." Now that's what my lady should possess - a mesmerising allure of the enigmatic girl next door and the one whose resume speaks for itself. UK's Harrow Observer columnist and Bollywood Hungama's London correspondent Devansh Patel, meets the apple cheeked sweetheart, Neha Dhupia, for a challenging 'date' that could've turned into a catastrophic one.....Thank God it didn't!..... but there's a vital tip for all those who are preparing to go on a 'date' - Be a good listener and never forget the flowers, coz you never know how thorny your 'date' can get. Are you listening?

Devansh Patel I'm here to flirt with you
Neha Dhupia: That's very abrupt, when somebody says, 'I'm here to flirt with you.' It needs to come out in the conversation. Minus five points already
DP: (laughs) Oh! So there's a point system here, huh?
ND: You've never met me before and you've got no idea what you're getting into (laughs).
DP: God bless me! Or you?
ND: No no. God has blessed me and I'm fine, touchwood. God needs to bless you now. Technically, if a man asks me out, I shouldn't be the one asking, 'Would you have tea or coffee?' I expect him to walk in with some red roses at least. So minus five again, and you're on a minus ten (laughs).
DP: Tell me something Neha, how important is it for a single girl like you to have a boyfriend?
ND: Generally speaking, sometimes in life, you need your mom and dad around, you need friends, and sometimes you need a lot of support from your partner - your boyfriend, so be it.
DP: That doesn't answer my question Neha.
ND: I don't think you should really have a man in your life for the sake of having a man. It should be value added. If it's not, it shouldn't be. Your affair shouldn't be painful. Like, you don't have to be answerable to the person all the time. The man and his woman should be able to grow mentally, emotionally in every way. If it's a burden in any form, then it shouldn't happen.

DP: When was the first time you came home drunk?
ND: I don't think my parents have ever seen me drunk. So technically, such things never happened when I was along with my parents.
DP: Oh is it?
ND: Yes. I do recall the moment now. I was offered Old Monk rum while I was in school. Those were the days when I used to do theatre. So as a celebration, that was the cheapest alcohol we got and I had one shot like how the tequila shots are taken. But nothing was happening. So I had my second shot. Still nothing happened. I had my third one and then I promise you I don't remember anything (laughs).
DP: Such a liar you are Neha
ND: I promise, I don't lie (laughs). Except for this one, I never lie.
DP: But men don't lie too.
ND: Oh is it? I think men don't lie too much to me because as a person, I'm not a control freak. I don't ask questions like, 'Where are you?' and 'What are you doing?' But yes, there has been an instance of a petty lies like, if I ask, 'How long will it take you to reach home?' and the answer comes, 'Five minutes'. But then that's men. They make you wait, don't they?
DP: Is that coming back to me now?
ND: (laughs) No, not at all. Don't worry, it's not a minus five.
DP: Wow! My black coffee arrives. Let's cheers to Raat Gayi Baat Gayi
ND: Cheers to Raat Gayi Baat Gayi and its success.
DP: Yes, I really wish that such films should get more prominence in our commercial world of cinema.
ND: I hope so too.
DP: I feel that post Bheja Fry, we are definitely opening new avenues to these kind of films. So, how is it to be working with the close knit family of Vinay, Ranvir, Saurabh, Rajat, etc?
ND: Well, I'm treated like sh**.
DP: What are you saying?
ND: (laughs). I'm joking. It's like 'Neha hain...woh toh kar legi'. That's what happens in the family.
DP: But that's good na?
ND: It's amazing. The feeling of belonging somewhere is the best feeling. They all treat me so well and always caring.
DP: Ok, when was the first time a man asked you out?
ND: I think it was in school. We went to Priya cinema's in Vasant Vihar, Delhi. But the guy just had money for the auto. So we travelled from my house to the cinema and walked around and came back.
DP: Do you like men with deep pockets?
ND: I didn't mean that. No, I don't like them.
DP: Are you a difficult woman to ask out for?
ND: I think people are inhibited for no reason. You must at least try na? No one even tries to ask me out. I'm sure, it's not only me but other actresses out there also feel the same way.
DP: That's because you are never out of your actress mind-set.
ND: I'm always out of the actress mind-set and I'm so normal that it doesn't matter to anyone. After five minutes, you don't feel like you're talking to Neha Dhupia. I just look a little strict but I'm not.
DP: Yeah, you do because it feels like you're going to spank someone real hard.
ND: No no. That would be everyone's dream come true (laughs).

DP: Do you know that men really fantasise about you?
ND: Oh really? Fantasise is a really big word yaar. So now, can you spell the word out please?
DP: No, I won't. And that's such a stupid question anyway.
ND: You called me stupid and so there's a minus five for you again. You're doing really bad here.
DP: Oh yeah! But you do sound like a cat here. Are you someone not to be trusted, like a cat?
ND: No, I'm not a cat and I hate pets. I think they should be out in the open and not in the house.
DP: But there are people who love their pets like their family. So why do you say that?
ND: Well, I'm just giving my opinion. There are always two sides to everything.
DP: When you friends go out or meet up, do you talk about getting laid and all?
ND: No, never ever. I don't even know what you're talking about. Can we please go to the next question? (Laughs)
DP: You like being clicked?
ND: I like being photographed but I don't like bad pictures. I don't know where to draw the line but that's how it is.
DP: What if you were to be clicked not by a photographer but by your boyfriend or a man with whom you are going to get married, what would be that picture which you would want him to click?
ND: A nice genuine smile. Sometimes a smile is really not genuine and it's a moment you need to capture and not a photograph.
DP: People have liked your smile, your height, your body. But I want to know something that you like about yourself.
ND: The fact that I am very real is what I like. What you see is what you get. I know how to have fun. You throw me in any situation and I'll have fun. All the rest of the materialistic things are temporary. I used to love my hair two years ago and now I don't care. I'm really funny.
DP: Can a one night stand get funnier?
ND: It doesn't get funnier than Raat Gayi Baat Gayi. I promise you that it is really funny for the ones who are watching and not for the four people who are involved in the film.

DP: Has your ego ever over powered yourself to such an extent that it has made matters worse?
ND: I'm sure it has. Ego is such a misleading emotion because it makes you do the wrong things and makes you believe that it's the right thing to do. Relationships aren't about ego. There is a logical and an illogical side to love. Love is about being illogical, it's about thinking from your heart and being with someone because that person wants you, let's you and makes you do crazy things. I have fallen a victim of ego many times but I am not scared of apologising. My temper is like a soda bottle. It goes fizzy and within minutes I calm down. I'm not vindictive as a person.
DP: What can go bizarrely wrong on a 'date'?
ND: The food. A lot of times people don't give importance to the food and for me, if you've got to take me out on a 'date', you've got to make sure it's fine dining or even if it's raste ka khana, it has to be delicious food. I'm a foodie and I'm not a girl who is shy of eating.
DP: What if a man can cook for you?
ND: I think that's fantastic.
DP: What's more sexier in a relationship? Having a shower with your man or massaging him?
ND: Oh oh! It's a bit of an out-there kind of a question. I don't think I can answer this one.
DP: Well, it has to be in there, not out there.
ND: I'm sorry but I can't answer this.
DP: You fall for a guy, you make up, then you break up and then fall for another one and the life goes on. How important is it to be in and out and in of any relationship?
ND: It's not a matter of importance. This is a way of life. You have to give it a shot, don't you? You never get into a relationship thinking that it'll end soon or you'll marry someone the next day. It's about trial and error. For me, it's a gradual progression.

DP: Your answers don't make me want to flirt with you but want to understand you better.
ND: That's what happens. I have that effect and that's why people don't flirt with me.
DP: Is there no Mr Perfect for you?
ND: Mr Perfect does not exist in the world. There are things that you need from him. Like a great mind, a great body, great looks, great attitude. I'm not saying perfect, but great. Men will always be men and women will always have to suffer.
DP: Would you have a relationship with a journalist?
ND: Why not? Of course yes. Love is a bizarre thing, it does strange things to you. I don't think there is anything wrong with actors as human beings and journalists too.
DP: That day comes Neha when someone proposes to you. Do you dream about such things too? We all dream, don't we?
ND: Do I dream about a great marriage proposal? Well, I am so disturbed about the whole institution and the concept of marriage that I've known more people in broken marriages than in steady ones. No one ever says that their marriage is fabulous and these are the same people who were in relationships before and were having a blast. So if that's what marriages come to, then whom am I going to get married to? If I think that I'll be happier without being married and I'd be respected, and if all this is going to change, I'll hold back.
DP: Do you give these preachy lessons to your mates?
ND: Not at all. I have many things to do than just sounding preachy. If they have some serious issues, we analyse. I'm a very practical person and try and solve things.
DP: What's Raat Gayi Baat Gayi all about then?
ND: It's about one night stands, alcohol, cheating, and all the wrong things.
DP: And one word which would describe yourself and the film?
ND: Mysterious
DP: I'll sing 'Mysterious girl' for you then
ND: I'm sure because your Mohawk hairstyle looks just like him (laughs).
DP: Sorry, I didn't get what you said. You see, I'm a very bad listener.
ND: That's bad. On a 'date' you need to listen to a girl or if you're a bit lost, you need to pretend to listen to a girl.
DP: I don't think I can pretend sweetheart. But I apologise.
ND: Well then, your 'date' is over.